The Boy Crisis Is Real: Why Boys Are Falling Behind and What We Must Do About It
Toxic masculinity, privilege, and outdated stereotypes—are we blaming boys for their own struggles?
For years, voices like Warren Farrell's have been sounding the alarm about the crisis facing boys and men in our society. The issue has been dismissed or ignored over the past decade, even with his writings and several other published books. However, with mounting data surfacing in mainstream news outlets, the situation's urgency is becoming impossible to overlook.
I found out about a new Pew Research survey that confirms what Farrell and others have been saying for decades: boys are struggling in school, feeling disconnected, and falling behind their female peers. Only 46% of boys plan to attend a four-year college, compared to 60% of girls. That's a big gap. But this isn't just about college plans—it's about the long-term consequences for boys who are left behind in a system that no longer seems built for them.
I recently read a piece in the New York Times that breaks down what's going on at historically Black colleges and universities. According to the article, only 19% of students at Howard University are Black men. Howard—my alma mater and one of the top HBCUs in the country—always felt like there were more women on campus than men, at least from what I remember back in the '80s when I was there. But now, it's not just a feeling—it's a fact. Black men on campus are outnumbered more than 4 to 1. In 1976, Black men made up 38% of students at HBCUs. Today? Just 26%. That's a serious drop.
What's causing the problem? It could be higher college costs, pressure to earn money right away, constant negative messages about academic potential, high school suspensions, and a lack of male teachers and role models. Maybe it's all of the above? Also, an education system that rewards students who sit still and follow the rules when boys often need movement, hands-on learning, and a different kind of engagement.
The Pew study also found that 23% of boys feel like teachers favor girls. That's not a small number—and it says a lot about how school feels to them. Most teachers are women, and while that's not a bad thing, it's worth asking how it shapes classroom culture. Boys are being told to calm down, sit still, and stop fidgeting—and if they don't, they get labeled as disruptive or, worse, put on meds to "fix" them. We've seen an increase in prescriptions for ADHD drugs for boys over the years, but why not for girls?
Meanwhile, girls are thriving. And that's great—I'm a father of a daughter, and I want her to succeed. But I'm also a father of a college-bound son, and I can't ignore the fact that boys are struggling more than ever. Our culture has spent decades putting all kinds of resources into empowering girls. Where has that same effort been for boys?
This isn't about tearing one group down to lift another up. We can support both, but right now, we're not.
We've built a culture that shames boys for being ambitious, mocks them for working hard, and treats masculinity like a disease—and it's destroying them. Boys are falling behind in school, disappearing from the workforce, and topping the charts in depression, addiction, and suicide. Young men are lost, disconnected, and fed up.
Our culture still obsesses over "toxic masculinity" while ignoring the flip side—toxic femininity—the manipulation, the emotional gatekeeping, the "believe all women" mindset that assumes guilt without evidence, the use of victimhood as power, and the constant narrative that men are always the problem. Where's the accountability there? We've spent years tearing boys down in the name of equality, but this isn't progress—it's a full-blown crisis, and it's getting worse by the day.
When young men speak up, they're told to toughen up, 'man up,' or quit whining.
I don't feel it's whining. It's a warning.
If we want a stronger society, we have to start recognizing that boys and girls are different and need different things. This means adapting school environments, encouraging male mentorship, and showing boys it's okay to succeed, care, and try. It also means talking about masculinity in a way that builds boys up instead of tearing them down.
For too long, American society has focused on empowering girls. And we've seen the results—girls are thriving. But what about boys? Our culture seems to keep leaving them behind.
The boy crisis is real. Are we finally ready to take the necessary steps to address it, or do we not care?
I’m Clayton Craddock—a father, business owner, musician, and truth-seeker who believes in asking hard questions and thinking independently. I share my thoughts on ‘Deep Cuts’ to challenge the status quo and dig beneath the surface.
If you would like to connect, please contact me at Clayton@claytoncraddock.com.
READ MORE:
Higher rates of depression and suicide among men: CDC - Suicide Facts & Data
At Black Colleges, a Stubborn Gender Enrollment Gap Keeps Growing - Only 19 percent of students at Howard University are Black men, whose enrollment levels at four-year colleges have plummeted across the board.
Pew Research Survey on Boys Falling Behind in School: Pew Research Center (Check their latest education reports)
On the Boy Crisis & Men Falling Behind
Warren Farrell's The Boy Crisis Website – https://www.boycrisis.org/
Richard Reeves' Work on Boys and Men – https://richardvreeves.com/of-boys-and-men/
Brookings Institution on Boys Falling Behind – https://www.brookings.edu/articles/why-boys-are-falling-behind/
American Psychological Association Report on Boys & Men – https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2018/08/boys-men-challenges
Christina Hoff Sommers on The War Against Boys – https://www.aei.org/research-products/book/the-war-against-boys/
On Education & Boys Falling Behind
Pew Research Report on Boys in School – https://www.pewresearch.org/ (Look at their latest education surveys)
Harvard Report on the Gender Gap in Education – https://www.hks.harvard.edu/publications/gender-gap-higher-education
Thomas B. Fordham Institute on the Education Gender Gap – https://fordhaminstitute.org/national/commentary/education-crisis-boys
The Atlantic: Why Boys Are Failing in School – https://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2017/08/the-problem-with-boys/537228/
National Center for Education Statistics (NCES) - Male College Enrollment Decline – https://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/indicator_cpb.asp
On Mental Health & Male Disengagement
CDC Report on Male Suicide Rates – https://www.cdc.gov/suicide/facts/index.html
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention - Male Suicide Statistics – https://afsp.org/suicide-statistics/
Psychology Today - The Mental Health Crisis in Boys & Men – https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-race-good-health/202303/the-mental-health-crisis-affecting-young-men
Dr. Leonard Sax - Why Gender Matters in Education & Mental Health – https://www.leonardsax.com/why-gender-matters/